I am a student at in Uru MÄnuka. In 2020 I was a year 7 and in 2021 I will be a year 8. This is a place where I will be able to share my learning with you. Please note....some work won't be edited - just my first drafts, so there may be some surface errors. I would love your feedback, comments, thoughts and ideas.
Friday 1 May 2020
1 comment:
To support my learning I ask you to comment as follows:
1. Something positive - something you like about what I have shared.
2. Thoughtful - A sentence to let us know you actually read/watched or listened to what I had to say
3. Something thoughtful - how have you connected with my learning? Give me some ideas for next
time or ask me a question.
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Hi Kian
ReplyDeleteSorry for taking so long to get back to you with feedback on your writing planning.
You've made a really good start on this - that is an amazing list of synonyms. My favourites were "evil warlord" and "anti-hero". I also liked "Kong King" (instead of King Kong) and "Zilla God" (instead of God Zilla).
I think you should move the events in box 4 (slide 16) and put it in the Resolution box (slide 17), because it is actually the resolution. What you have in the resolution box is more an epilogue. Google epilogue if you don't know what that means.
I look forward to reading your finished story. Keep it up!
- Mr Mitchell